Applying for jobs....

So this post might seem a little odd for those of you who know my current circumstances but I need to put some things to words first. And this helps others know where I am coming from!


          So, applying for jobs is awful, especially applying for jobs outside of the state.  Thankfully with the beauties of technology, often after filling out one application all you have to do is hit 'apply' and its off! However, there are so many jobs for teachers and they get filled so quickly that it seems like a never ending process.  Almost daily I check my websites to see new postings and check my ideal location schools for new opportunities, sorting through things and trying to decide what would really work for me.  At first I tried to be particular to location, grade level, district, etc. But after numerous No Thank Yous or no responses, I have gotten to the point of applying even if I really don't think its the perfect job.  After I told someone that I applied to a school in Nevada, she asked me if I thought it would be an awesome place to work and live. My response was that I had no clue, I just wanted a job. I was and still am completely emotionless to the entire process. I don't even get nervous hitting the apply button anymore.
          What is worse is getting further along in the process. I have participated in a handful of after-application but still preliminary questionnaires.  Hope arises just slightly especially when I get to know the school a little better and think it really might be a good fit for me.  But sure enough.... nothing. After the first couple, I again was emotionless.  I hope the reason for my lack of emotion is faith, that I know God will provide the perfect job in his perfect timing but I suspect the reason is fear of not getting a job and being stuck. Even though I do feel quite prepared by Spring Arbor, which is awesome, I often wonder how teachers ever got started. I know the economy isn't helping, but why would someone want to hire a new teacher who technically doesn't know what she is doing!?! I wouldn't want to hire a newbie!  But again, I know I have to have hope. So bottom line, I am emotionless about the entire process, BUT I have hope.  I know that my God is greater than all things and will provide something, maybe a sub position, maybe a position I never thought I wanted, or maybe, hopefully my dream position.  Although emotionless, I am hopeful and that I think is enough.