Weekend Fun

I have been filling my weekends with lots of fun and exciting things. Sometimes I have to be careful to not overcommit because there is so much happening all the time!

The past few weekends I have started meeting up with a group of expats from all over the world - London, South Africa, Germany, USA, Kenya, Lebanon, and more. I even met someone else who was living in Thailand for a few years and got to reminisce with them about it, we even shared some of our Thai language which really made my heart happy! People are here for all sorts of reasons and for all lengths of time. Is it nice to meet other expats that arent part of school to remember that life exists outside of the people I see literally every day!

Last night I went to the US compound beside school and participated in a trivia night a friend was hosting. Our group of teachers came in 2nd place which was our goal, because first place had to host the next time!! My love of TV was helpful in the final round, which was my only contribution. I am terrible at trivia but I like doing it and being around the people.

Then I met up with a group of people at a new restaurant called Junkyard. It was really hipster and trendy and very chill. Its an outdoor garden type place that I definitely want to return to without a giant group! 

Last weekend was a co-workers birthday so they hosted a big birthday bash and then we went out to a club that a parent invited me to... its weird to socialize so much with parents but they really love the support. Its a new area for me to have parents buy me a drink but you gotta work with the cultures, right! Just to be clear, this parent and his wife were opening this new bar so they were trying to get more business by inviting me and asking me to bring friends, which I did!

My friend Amy who is the Athletic Director at my school!

We had just a bit of fun!

 I have also been participating in new things that I normally wouldnt do!  On Friday the school hosted a Hungarian Percussion Group called Talmaba. They were SO good.  After they performed a bit, they did a few songs with the school band so it was fun. I was really glad that I stayed after a long day at work for the concert.  It was a great way to end the week.

I have also played softball a few times in effort to do new things. I am terrible at it but enjoy being with new people and being outside. We play at school against US Embassy people. Some of the people can be a bit intense, but they are generally pretty welcoming to newbies like myself. 

I love that there is so many options for things to do on the weekends and people who are willing to have tag alongs and share what is happening. The school has done a good job of setting us up with community and helping us feel welcomed. I am so thankful for that. Even though there are times when I feel like I dont belong, I look at my photos and think about all the things I am doing and realize I am busy, I am active, and I am loving my time here!

Im more honest with my students

I found myself being more honest this week with my students than I am with my own friends or people in my life.

Its a realization that really struck me and I had to think about.

As a teacher, it is good that I am being honest with them. At least I am being honest with them and not making the world look better than it is.  But I have the feeling that really I am being more honest with them because I know it wont go anywhere. I know they wont hold me accountable or question me or challenge me.  I know they wont judge me or think Im silly. BUT they also wont encourage me or befriend me or keep me sane.

Yesterday I read a story to them about a kid who moved away and was really sad.  Then we discussed how moving away can be hard and people need time to adjust to new things. That they may not want to be friends right away but that you should keep trying because they might at some point. I challenged them to keep encouraging new people and if they are new to not feel sad for too long when you miss your friends from other places.

As I sent them off to recess, I had to stop and reflect about how much of what I was just saying was true for me. I think I needed to hear my speech more than they did! Transition is hard. Especially when so many things change at once. But I cant give up. And I cant blame others when I am feeling lonely.

These feelings lead me to my conversation today. We were talking about special people in our lives and stories that we could share about these special people. I decided to tell my students about my Gramps.  He passed away on Friday and it has made me very sad.  But what has made me more sad, I think, is that I had told 3 people about it. I needed to share these stories so I told them. But it felt so nice to talk about it that I realized I need to open up with people more. I need to be willing to share about me.

So that was my task this week. To share more of myself with the people that I am living life with, to reach out to people more.  It is not something that comes naturally for me, but it is something that makes me feel better, more connected, more alive. Sometimes it didnt go as I planned, I messed up my words, I overshared, or even worse those who I thought were trusted safe people went and shared my feelings with others, but all of that is life and I will be okay.  I just need to stop sheltering myself so much and allowing other people into my life too.  It will take time, it wont be easy, but it is a vital piece for my sanity, contentment, and joy in life and so it must be done!

Surprises of Abuja

A friend recently asked me what things have been surprising since being here. At first I didnt have an answer but once I thought about it a handful of exciting things came to mind. Im so thankful she asked me that question to help me realize some of the great things about being here.

First, having a common language of English has been super helpful. Im not as afraid to step out because I know I will be able to communicate on some level with most people I would run into.  It means I can order food, get an Uber, call people, talk to custodians and security guards. It helps me feel safe and opens doors that in Thailand or many other places I might not have had.

Another surprise is how many expats there are. I have already done events at one of the US embassies and the British Embassy as well.  There are tons of things happening all the time.  Everyone is super nice and understanding that we all are living abroad and may need some extra grace a time or two. Its also nice that it is diverse and not just Americans but people from all over.

The grocery stores have tons of things! Some things still cost a lot more than I would pay in America, but most of the things I might want to have I can get. And there are even some things that I dont want or miss that I can get :)

Some of the luxuries that I had in Thailand are still available here.  They are a bit more expensive than in Southeast Asia but not nearly the price of America.  I can get my nails done or get a massage for a cheap price.  We have food delivery and all kinds of restaurants.  I can get clothes tailor made just for me (which is my plan this week) with Nigerian fabrics or regular clothes AND I wont have to tell them that I need a big size for my hips!

The weather so far has been wonderful. Its rainy season right now and that means that most afternoons it rains for 30-40 minutes.  Some nights it rains all night, but it hasnt rained much during the days. It has even been sorta chilly at times in the evening (like low 70s)! Also there are pretty sunsets here so that is cool too! I didnt get to see many sunsets in Chiang Mai so its a nice change.

Im sure there are more things but thats all my brain has for now. I have been pleasantly surprised with Abuja so far and have a feeling it will just continue!

Sunset over Jabi Lake. Jabi Lake Mall overlooks the lake!

CrossFit workout at the British Embassy compound

Sand Volleyball at the US Embassy compound that connects to our school

School

I have finished my first week of school and it was wonderful! My students are so kind and sweet. I have a few talkative ones but we are just getting used to each other.  I only had 13 of my 21 students and have been told that is semi-normal. Of my 13 that I had, 3 were born in Africa (2 Nigeria and 1 Uganda) 6 were born in America, 3 were born in Europe (2 England and 1 Italy) and 1 is from Israel. Next week we have now 4 days off because of a religious holiday and many families wont return to school until the week after that holiday. So hopefully by the end of the month I will have met all my students! 

Im still getting used to a new schedule and am struggling to pick my students up on time from specials or recess ans let them go at the right times. But it will come.  Im basically living on grace these first few weeks as I am just trying to get through it.  When I asked my class on Friday what their favorite parts of the week were, I had 2 students say that meeting me was their favorite part, so I guess Im doing okay :)

My Teaching Assistant, Naomi, and I on the first day of school. 

 My classroom is large with desks, a library, 2 teacher desks, a small group table, and more. The teacher before me was VERY organized and left me in great condition to start the year. Its still coming together but I am very excited about my classroom.

Calendar area and Ms. Naomi's desk

Student desks and my desk

Another view of the classroom

students writing and my room!

The elementary has two long buildings in the shape of a U with a courtyard in between with KG-Grade 2 classrooms on one side and Grade 3-5 on the other side with Art, Music, and French at the back.  My classroom is the first room on the 3-5 side so it is the closest to basically everything :)  The school has a lot of outdoor space for everyone.  This is a large outdoor playground that the kids play on twice a day during their 2 recesses. There is also covered walkways that they can sit or play one when they want too.

The playground on a BEAUTIFUL day!

 The outdoor sports facilities are very nice too! But the gym inside isnt that great.  They are talking of building a new building for a gymnasium but it hasnt been confirmed yet.

Outside facilities - tennis, soccer, and basketball

the pool - our new apartments to the right and fields below

the front entrance to school. Everyone goes through security at this building. 

Security is very important, not only at school, but everywhere in Nigeria.  In most places you go through security before entering - banks, malls, restaurants - almost everywhere.  At school we all have to wear ID badges (including students and parents). When we enter campus, we scan our bags and walk through a metal detector. Then we scan ID badge too.  Its usually an efficient process so its not too bad. 

Another awesome thing at school is technology. I was given a new Macbook and a new iPad.  All of my students have iPads to use in the classroom as well.  I still havent experimented much with it but I am so excited to explore ways to use technology in my classroom.  I am supposed to lock my room every time Im not in it and now that I have all this technology in my room I am very aware of how important it is to do that!

Also, the school arranges transportation for the staff to and from school.  So everyday we all ride the bus together to get to school.  In the evenings they have 2 options for buses, one right when work ends and one an hour or so later for people who want to work more or do other things on campus.   Its weird that I ride a bus now, but its nice that I dont have to find my own way of getting there.  Once Im actually living on campus, it will be much nicer to be able to go in to work whenever I want.

The staff is fairly active and they are good at promoting social activities so there is lots going on. There is staff basketball once a week. They are starting volleyball once a week. We did a Luau party this Saturday which was a lot of fun. Last week we all went to 'Bush Bar' which is basically just a local outdoor space with food and drinks. Its nice to know that the school wants us to know each other and supports us socially as well as professionally. 

Staff Luau at the pool of my apartment complex

thats a bit about my new school.  It has lots of good things, and obviously some not so good things too but I am liking what I see so far!

First week

Overall, I would say my first week was good.  In a different head space, I would probably even say it was great.  But tonight, I have definitely reached my limit.  As an introvert, this first week has been intense.  I am hopeful that this next week of introductions will not be as intense.

Everyday a school bus comes to our apartment complex and picks us up. It takes about 10-15 minutes to get to school. We all went to the same meetings for most of the days. We all had lunch together. We sometimes had time in our classrooms to get it organized. At 3:45 we piled back on the bus to go home. At 530 the bus picked us back up to take us out to dinner with the same group of people or to the grocery store. And then by 8 or 9 or sometimes 10 we got back home to rest.

That happened for 6 days.

It was exhausting!

Today I got to go to the grocery store whenever I wanted, via Uber. With whoever I wanted. For however long I wanted. 

It was GLORIOUS!

But then we had a whole staff barbeque where I was supposed to meet the returning staff. But I couldnt. I was exhausted.  I met maybe 2 people and then sat with my other newbies and yawned... a lot! When we were finally dismissed I came home and crashed.

But I made it through my first week. I cant believe it has been a week. But it also seems like I have been here much longer than a week. 

The school has been great hosts though and Abuja has been so welcoming and warm. I am loving some of the luxuries of being in a proper American school - we have Crayola markers and BIC pens and proper construction paper!! My students will have iPads and I got a Macbook on the first day of work.  My classroom is stocked with supplies and storage and items I could only dream about in Thailand. (my next post will be more about the school)

The city is full of food and culture. We have been to Mexican, Lebanese, Indian, Italian, and seafood restaurants.  Not to mention our lunches have had some traditional Nigerian grub as well! I will definitely eat well in this city!! I cant wait to explore more as I get settled in and figure out ways to be social and yet not over do it!

Here are some pics of my apartment.

One of the 3 apartment buildings. Mine is the second floor.

My kitchen.

the dining room

the living room (I am standing at the front door)

my bedroom

opposite my bed is my built in wardrobe and bathroom

Brave?

People kept telling me that I am brave.  I dont feel that way though.  I dont feel like I am doing anything special or out of the ordinary.  I am following the desires that have been laid on my heart.

But Im scared. Im alone. And sometimes its hard.

But that doesnt make me brave.  

Continuing my old life wasnt an option anymore.  Everything I once knew was being pulled out from under me, sure most things were my choice, but that doesnt make it easier.  Returning 'home', while may seem easier to most, would have been the hardest option for me.  It would have been sacrificing so much of me. It might have even broken me.  So here I am in Nigeria instead living the life I want. 

Starting your life completely over is a little bit terrifying and a lot a bit freeing. Having some constants definitely helps though, especially when its the important ones. 

Teaching is part of me. I could do it anywhere. When I talk about it, I get excited. When I walk into a classroom, I know what to do. So that is part of why I know I will be successful here. I know I can teach. I know I can be happy as long as I am doing that. And so far that is basically all I’m doing so I’m good. 

Living abroad is a constant. It is so nice to be with people who understand this lifestyle, who desire it, who have similar life experiences.  Just being around them helps makes this easier.  Already we have bonded in ways that some people dont get after years of working together.  

I told a few people this while 'home' this summer - for me, teaching is the easy part. Its living in Africa and finding new community that will be the challenge for me.  Africa will definitely take some getting use to but I have a feeling I am going to Love it.  Im also pretty sure I am going to find community here as I have already met some great people and cant wait to keep meeting people.  Even though I completely agree my initial thoughts, starting my life over right now gives me so much freedom.  I can be the person I want to be. I can do the things I want to do. There are no expectations. There are no previous understandings.  I can be me. AND its okay that I dont know exactly who that is or what that looks like.  Its freeing to know that no one else does either.  I can share what I want to share and leave out parts I dont. 

So even though I dont feel brave. Even though I am back at square one. Even though this is not how I pictured my life last year.  I am content.  I am certain this is where I am supposed to be for this time. I am certain that I will survive.